Feeling Stuck?

cbtbournemouth
Jun 12, 2025
3 min read

What’s Holding You Back in Life?

Do you feel stuck? notice yourself circling through the same patterns, having the same thoughts, or hitting the same emotional walls - without really understanding why?

You’re not alone.

In my experience as a CBT therapist I have often heard clients say:

'I want to but I just can’t seem to move forward'

So, what actually holds us back in life? What's stopping you from improving how you feel and your satisfaction for life? And more importantly, what can we do about it? Lets explore this a bit more now.

1. The Beliefs You Didn't Know You Held

No you're not being 'lazy', 'stupid', 'unmotivated', You aren't 'useless', 'worthless' or 'strange'. You might actually have some strong beliefs about yourself, others and the world operating in the background, silently influencing your ability to effect change.

Have you ever caught yourself thinking:

'I have to get everything right, or I’ve failed'
'Other people are allowed to rest, but I’m not'
'I don’t deserve success unless I’ve earned it the hard way'

These thoughts and rules can tick away quietly in the background, shaping your behaviour, limiting your options and choices, and keeping you feeling stuck in the cycle of stress, overwork, or avoidance.

👉 Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) could help you to bring these hidden beliefs into the light so you can notice the impact on you.

2. Fear of Failure - Or Fear of Success

Sometimes, we stay still because moving forward feels scary, unsafe and dangerous. That might be a fear of getting it wrong or failing, but equally, it might be fear of what comes next if you succeed.

'What if I try and others see me fail?'
'What if people expect more from me?'
'What if I can’t keep it up and let people down'

These anxious thoughts can restrict you and narrow your world. CBT Therapy could help you recognise these thoughts and beliefs and idetify your coping strategies. With this knowledge and understanding you could build momentum and get the change which feels important to you.

3. Self-Criticism That Sounds Like Motivation

Many people believe they need to be hard on themselves to get anything done. But when your inner voice is constantly at you, telling you you are not good enough and everyone else is better, it's not motivating - it can feel paralysing.

CBT could help you in developing a more compassionate internal voice which can be a powerful step toward real meaningful change for you.

4. Avoidance (That Looks Like Busyness)

Sometimes we think we are being productive, but we’re actually avoiding. We overwork, overthink, over-prepare... but still don’t take the real next step.

This can leave you exhausted and frustrated, with very little progress to show for your efforts, or progress which isn't meaningful for you. CBT can help you learn how to tolerate discomfort and break the avoidance trap.

5. You’ve Never Been Shown How

This is a big one. No one teaches us how to:

Set boundaries
Say no
Sit with uncertainty
Manage discomfort
Challenge our thoughts
Develop a compassionate relationship with yourself

If you’re feeling stuck, it doesn’t mean you are trapped and broken. It might just mean you are trying really hard but have never been taught the tools or given the opportunity to move forward - that’s something CBT therapy can could help with.